February 2012
11 posts
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New York Magazine: Vines by the Rhyme →
I wrote a short Intelligencer piece for New York Magazine about how rappers have helped make moscato more popular than it might be otherwise, and how that’s interesting because it’s the first time rappers used their considerable influence on consumers to drive us towards a species instead of a product (maybe?).
GIRLS ARE PRETTY: Fistfight Over Leanne Day! →
girlsareprettyforever:
When you spot some random dude walking your old Corgi Leanne you run out of the bar to find out what the fuck. “I’m just helping out Sharon,” he’ll say. His name’s Mark. “She won’t be home in time.” “Yeah well you may get to fuck my ex-girlfriend, but you do not get to walk my dog.” Punch him…
If you’re not following Girls Are Pretty Forever, why do you even...
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WatchGucci Mane “Quiet”
1. Gucci Mane is good again.
2. The hook equates money with speech, which is just so timely.
Errol Morris: El Wingador →
“Hey, my name is ‘El Wingador,’ not ‘El Hotdogador.’ ”
This is the sort of thing that you can only get away with if you have a thick South Jersey/Philly accent.
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“I think “Jamal” trying to tre-flip 20 stairs and taking out an old...”
– A commenter on The Classical known only as ‘peyote,’ to me. It’s especially amusing because he’s vaguely racist himself and cannot write. Pretty harsh stuff, though!
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January 2012
38 posts
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The Classical: Why Longboards Suck →
I explained, as best I could, why longboards suck on The Classical.
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Hungry Rapps
Foods mentioned in Future’s “Tony Montana”, in order: Banana, cantaloupe, [po]tato, crab cakes, banana (again).
They say you spend more at the grocery store if you go there hungry — your primordial instinct to horde kicks in and you get home realizing you’ve been had by Food Bazaar on the canned salmon deal (there’s no such thing as a deal on canned salmon!)....
“Inductees sang Wall Street-themed versions of “Mama, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow...”
– :-/
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“POOLE: And given my interest in making sure we have clear communication, I have...”
– This is what the Federal Open Markets Committee was up to at the height of the housing bubble. This meeting had 45 instances of [Laughter]. Greenspan is referred to as Yoda later on, to [Laughter].
Spotted everywhere, but especially here.
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GIRLS ARE PRETTY: Storage Wars Day! →
girlsareprettyforever:
You went on that show Storage Wars and you bid on the stuff in one of the lockers and won. You brought home all the porcelain knick knacks, bed linens, jewelry, and old Life magazines that could fit into an 8X10 foot space. “Which is why I’m going to kill your wife and daughters if I don’t get…
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WatchFan Fiction
Eric Cantor is doing 90 on the Beltway in a yellow Lamborghini with a Newport 100 dangling out of the corner of his mouth, as he half-assedly sings along to the hook of “Black and Yellow”, which is on repeat. Ronald Reagan’s corpse is sitting shotgun, and he has the window down despite the bitter January cold. Cantor is almost late to preventing a roll call vote from...
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December 2011
40 posts
